You Think You're Better Than Me?

You're not.

Nor am I better than you.

One must ask, what is it that would make one soul inherently superior to another?  Maybe someone has made wiser choices than me.  Maybe someone is kinder or more generous.  But that doesn't make one inherently better or worse.  That's stuff we decide after that judgment has been passed.

Some will tell you that all of us are equal, but that God is above us on the totem pole.  I disagree.  I don't believe God sees us as less than himself.  And I challenge anyone to convince me otherwise.  How does one value a soul?  Find me a working method, please, if you can.

Superiority is totally an illusion, and it's completely insane that we all don't understand this by now.  Treating others as though it isn't only leaves someone feeling miserable.  Doesn't it make sense that if we see all others as equal to us, we won't treat them like shit because it's like we're doing it to ourselves?  The "Golden Rule" is a good motto to live by.  You have to approach some things not only from your own viewpoint, but from the other side(s) as well.  Once you understand that the other person is equal to yourself, you will begin to see their joys and their struggles as your own.  The day we realize this as a society is the day our planet will change for the better.  And you'll notice it right away.

It's been said that the very moment one thinks himself superior is the moment he acts inferior.  And when one acts this way, he robs the other of the most basic dignity there is: the value of his soul.  Superiority always comes at the expense of another, and thus cannot be of any good use if we want to improve humanity and the situation we've put it in.

Anytime you look at another, be reminded that they are worth just as much as you.

Good night, and God bless.

Who He Is

I'll borrow a concept from Christianity that, for these purposes, works very well.  It has to do with what they called the Triune nature of God.  I believe it was C. S. Lewis who brought this concept to my mind, that there was the Father and the Son, and they were so intensely and intimately united that this union was itself also a Person as much as the Father and the Son.  This, of course, was the Holy Spirit.

I've been thinking about this lately, and I've come to the conclusion that Christianity is agonizingly close on this one.  See, what I believe is actually similar on this point.  All souls are united in such a way as I described in the previous paragraph.  And this union itself is also a Person.  This is the one I call God, but I don't believe him to be separate from me.  Yet he has all moments to draw from, all souls to look into, all the resources in the relative and absolute realms from which to use to experience himself, and to help us.  Perhaps the fact that I no longer see any of us as separate souls is what's making this concept easier for me to understand now that I'm not a Christian.

There is only one of us.  And we all can have the power of God, if we have faith.  We can all have his wisdom, if we just listen.  How do you think Jesus was able to do it?  It's harder than it sounds, but the rewards are well worth it.  Anything Godly is.

Good night, and God bless.

Mom

Today is the 6 year anniversary of my mother’s death. She was a fantastic woman, and there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t miss her. Alas, I have no control over her soul, and it chose to leave us then. I guess her soul was finished what it came here to do.

And it’s the soul aspect I’m here to talk about today. I’m not sure where her soul is, or in what form it’s in, but I am sure it is of her own choosing. (I don’t believe in heaven or hell.) But wherever she is, she’s there to experience a new aspect of herself. God is experiencing himself through her, just as he does with all of us, because we are all one.

Death is not an end to life, it’s just a transition from life to life. Christianity even agrees on this…but after that we differ. And it’s not at all a sad experience for the one dying, in fact it is a great awakening. Because then she is drawn back into God. And then from this perspective she chooses the next life she will live. So will it be for all of us.

RIP Mom, and may your next life be filled with wonders beyond your imagination.

Good night and God bless!

Paralyzed For Life
Now Playing: Vamos Nenas - Cordero

I can still move my limbs, don't worry.  If you know anything about my blog it's that the title has a deeper meaning.

I really don't know what I want to do with my life.  Okay, what I really want is to be rich and not have to work, then I could afford to do most anything I wanted.  But I have no plan to get from here to there, and the lottery odds are outrageous.

As a child I was always among the brightest kids in the class, and it took me very little effort to sustain that.  I suppose my greatest asset was my mathematical skills, but I was very good in the other subjects too.  My grades fell off a bit as I entered high school, but were still good eniough to pass easily.

The fact is that I've never put a lot of effort into anything much in my life.  There are few things I get passionate about, and whatever I choose for a career, if I do at all, it probably won't be one of them; it'll just be something I can tolerate.  And yes, perhaps I need to change my perspective on this, but I'm just going on past experience.

I think I'm afraid to fail.  I'm pretty sure that's my problem.  I haven't taken many risks in my life. And as Homer Simpson put it, "Stupid risks are what make life worth living".  Seriously, any major decision I have made, what have I had to lose?  For that matter, how many serious life decisions have I made?  I can only really think of one off the top of my head, the time I moved to Nanaimo to be nearer to Melissa.  That relationship ended quickly, because I was way too nervous and thus we didn't have any chemistry.  There were other reasons, but they all tie in to the same root of fear.  Here we are, nearly 3 years later, and I'm not a great deal closer than I was.  I don't have a girlfriend, not because I can't get one, but because I don't feel I'm ready as a man to handle the kind of relationship I'm looking for.  I don't have a place of my own, because I have a crummy job and I'm afraid to change the situation.  I'm afraid to sink the money into extra schooling or I'm afraid of getting shot down if I look elsewhere.  I'm afraid to go to college because I don't want to spend the money on something that I might decide is not for me.  I have no social life because...well, I guess this one's just a fear of rejection.  Maybe I just feel safe here, but it's like a womb...it'll keep you safe for a while, but soon you gotta get outta there or else it will do you more harm than good, and will end up killing you.

You see, I have allowed fear to rule my life.  Because of that, I cannot change my station in life, and I'm left to wallow in self-pity.  And the worst thing is I know all of this and have rendered myself powerless to change it.  There are two basic energies in this universe, love and fear, and I must choose at every moment which I am going to use.  I've chosen fear so far, and if I continue to do so, I will further be paralyzed by my fear, and my life will get worse and worse, and I will soon alienate myself from everyone.

It's been said that the essence of love is freedom, and should I choose that option, that's what I should expect to get.  If I don't care anymore about what I'm afraid of, it will lose its hold on me.  Then I will be free to live and love life to the fullest, wherever it takes me.  If I can't do this, then I will forever feel like I've wasted my life.

Don't let fear paralyze you.  Fear is the grandest illusion of all.  You need not experience it if you don't want to, and I can't see how it's a desirable thing for anyone.  Whatever you're afraid of, it's probably not likely to happen, and even if it does, you can handle it.

I hope I can apply this message, because if not, this is my most hypocritical entry in the 4+ year history of this blog.

Good night, and God bless.

Ignorance Is Bliss

Or so they say. Well, it’s bull, because if it were true, then a truly omniscient being, such as God, would have to be miserable all the time, in his own personal hell. Also, to be truly happy, you would be best off knowing nothing at all. If this law were true, knowledge would be completely undesirable.

I was thinking of this, and my thoughts turned to the biblical account of the Garden of Eden. God places Adam and Eve there, and tells them not to eat of the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Personally I think in this system God would be more glorified if we knew good and evil for what they were, and then made the choice to do good. But at this point they didn’t know the difference. Nor could they expect to. It was God’s word against Satan’s, and no moral standard had yet been set. Don’t eat of the tree, God says, but Adam and Eve could not come to the conclusion that eating the fruit was bad, and that not doing so was good. They could not know God himself as good or Satan as bad. Was this heaven on earth? Does this mean we should all make no distinction between good and evil? Even “The Lord’s Prayer” asks that it be on earth as it is in heaven.

But, apparently, God did know the difference, for he goes throughout the entire Bible telling us what to do and what not to do. As the creator, he does have the authority to do this. But this also means there is something God does not want us to know. It’s something God can hold over our heads. As God didn’t want them to eat of the tree, I imagine God wouldn’t want anyone to. In this case, none of us are supposed to be able to distinguish between good and evil.

Imagine for a second that Adam and Eve did not eat the fruit from that tree. Not one of us would have the capacity to distinguish between good and evil. This means I could have sex with someone else’s wife, and we’d call it adultery, but we wouldn’t know it was bad. I could lie and kill and steal to my heart’s content, and be totally unaware I was doing anything wrong. Doesn’t seem like paradise to me. These are things God later forbids in the Bible. If they were wrong at the time of the commandment, it would stand to reason that they were wrong at any point in human history, whether previous or following. The not knowing of this is hardly a blissful state, and the consequences that would arise, we would have no answer for.

Of course, the Bible says they did eat the fruit, which raises more questions. How is it possible for us humans to thwart the will of an omnipotent God? If God truly wants something, he gets it. His failing to get it suggests either that he is not omnipotent (and there are things outside his control), or that he actually did want them to eat the fruit. That creates a situation where they both followed God’s will and disobeyed his command, leaving God looking like a hypocrite.

Personally, I feel the whole story is riddled with logical, and thus historical, inconsistencies. Our choice is only free if we have an idea what our choices mean. I believe morality to be subjective, but I’m very glad I can make the distinction. And I do this based on both my belief of my relation to God and my experience of him. It’s so much better than believing things solely based on another’s authority, particularly someone who’s gonna send my butt to hell if I unwittingly make a mistake.

The more I look at Christianity, the less sense it makes.

Good night, and God bless.

My Mind Is Still Set On You

It's been 13.5 months.  But sometimes I still fall into Christian thought patterns.  What I mean by that is, my instincts are still set to think that way.  Then I think to myself, but I don't believe that anymore, it doesn't make sense to me anymore.  I've spent my whole life as a Christian until last year and my mental presets still have to be manually overridden.

Basically, what I'm saying is, I had trained my mind to think in a certain way, namely, through the lens of Christianity.  Everything I thought was put in a Christian context, for that was how I saw, well, really, all of life.  Over a year later, and sometimes I still have to tell myself, hey, you're not a Christian anymore.  That lens doesn't do the job, that philosophy doesn't fly.  I gotta train my mind to reflect my new beliefs, and tweak it evermore as I learn more about God and his universe.

The human mind is subject to manipulation from without and within, but we have the ability to control what we think and feel.  We accept whatever we find logical, but sometimes we just find it easier to be manipulated from without and not put as much serious thought into things as we should.  It's amazing how many things we follow blindly, without questioning at all whether they stand up to the test of logic or not.

And it's important to realize when we actually do examine our beliefs, that we should go in as free of bias as possible.  Assume nothing.  Be open to all possibilities.  Do not bring your Christian goggles (or whatever faith you may have), for it will severely narrow your search and limit what you learn.  You may end up with different answers than I have (or will, since it is an ongoing process that will last the rest of my life), and that doesn't make you or me right or wrong...in fact, both of us are likely to find much truth in different areas of our search, maybe I find some that you don't, and vice versa.

I'm learning to take control of my mind again, so to say. I'm thinking for myself.  Religion restricts the mind.  It's a crutch.  I've realized that now and done away with it.  Soon enough, my instincts will catch up.  It takes a while when you've always been told one way and you suddenly believe another.

Good night and God bless!

Ooh, Heaven Is A Place On Earth

I don’t believe in heaven or hell as physical locations, or as places where you go after God has judged you and your life. Heaven I can see a point for, but even then it has to be way different than our conception of it, and it’s not even really necessary to my way of thinking. The presence of hell would make God look like a vindictive asshole. Seriously, what does God possibly have to gain from hell? And with it being eternal, if I were one of the damned I would feel that God was the most uncaring, unforgiving being that could possibly be. This is one of the biggest reasons I dumped Christianity.

Anyway, I was talking with a guy from work a few weeks ago, and…well you know how a random comment, maybe even in jest, can trigger a deep thought in your mind? He said something along the lines of “you should be miserable like the rest of us”. So I asked him why on earth he would choose to be miserable.

The point I’m trying to make is that heaven and hell are really…states of mind. If you choose peace, joy, and love, you will have a heavenly state of mind. If you choose anger, hate, and resentment, you will have a hellish state of mind. And you can choose how you are going to feel. Your feelings are not depended on the circumstances that surround them. It only seems that way because you’ve gotten used to associating a certain feeling with a certain circumstance. We all do it more than we think, and it can be a nasty habit sometimes.

So in this sense, heaven can be a place on earth…in fact it can be any place. But only if you choose it to be so.

Good night and God bless!

My Best Friend

If you’ve spent enough time around me, you’ve probably heard me claim that God was my best friend. In terms of what he has done for me, yes, I’m totally grateful, but I still feel like there should be more going from me to him. Friendship is supposed to be a two-way street, be it with a deity or not.

I’ll be honest, here’s my problem. Ever since I dropped Christianity, I’m not sure how really to talk to God. What I mean by that is, when I was a Christian I worshipped him, I asked him for things, I laid out my problems in front of him. I suppose in this aspect I was better off then. Really, what I think I ought to do is talk to God like I talk to Josh or Scott or any of my other close friends….but that’s easier said than done. It’d be a lot easier if I heard words coming back.

You know, God still cares for me as much as he always has. That I’ve never doubted. God is holding up his end of this relationship., and I ought to…well it’s not even so much that I ought to, it’s that I want to be better friends with God. I don’t see any reason why it would be a bad idea.

Good night, and God bless!

Identity Crisis

To understand where my beliefs are coming from, one question must be answered first. And that question is namely this: who do I think God is? The issue of God’s identity is and has to be the absolute core of what I believe; this was true when I was a Christian and it is still true now. The difference is that, well, He is a different God to me now than before.

I’ll put it quite simply: I believe God to be all that was, is, and ever will be. I believe Him to be the Creator of all things, and I believe Him to precede the universe of time and space in which we now live; in fact, He transcends it. I still believe Him to be all-knowing, all-loving, all-powerful, and ever-present, among countless other attributes, many of which He manifests through us. If it isn’t God, it isn’t real.

Think about it though. Every serious religion will tell you that God is spirit, and thus does not live within the constraints of time or space. Now consider our universe…these are our dimensions. I’ll take the example of you sitting in your chair. To you, you are “here”, and to me, you are “there”. What I’m trying to say is, everything in the universe is relative. I can only describe your position as it appears from my perspective. Nothing in time or space is fixed. And none of the dimensions can contain the Spirit of God. God is Life. God is Truth. God is Love. God is Joy.

You may ask why then He would create the universe? Why would He not be content to just be? He knows Himself to be who He is. But I believe God wished to experience Himself, something He could not do without a forum (our universe) to do it in. I’m not saying He got bored, I’m just saying, He wanted to do stuff, instead of just being. He never lost that part of Himself. And the way He decided to do that, was to create the universe, with living creatures like us. I’m not going to say we’re the only ones out here, or even the most advanced, but we are an example of God experiencing Himself through His creation.

Yeah, I’m saying it, I am God. So are you. So is everyone else. Maybe if we take this to heart, we won’t commit all the atrocities that we do to each other…sometimes (falsely) in the name of God. This is going to be hard to take at first, especially since pretty much anyone who’s reading this is probably a Christian…unless I’ve already told you, then this is really no surprise. My subsequent posts will reflect what I believe, and they will all elaborate further on who I believe God to be. Should you choose not to believe it, that’s fine by me, and I won’t judge you for it. But please keep an open mind…truly consider how much sense I would be making if what I was saying was right.

I have tons more ideas on the way. Good night, and God bless!

I Spy

I am living a double life. There are only a few select people I’ve told about my change in beliefs, and I guess I’m guilty of trying to look Christian in Christian surroundings without actually being one.

Now why, you might ask, am I doing this? Well, frankly, if someone asks, I’m going to tell them the truth, but I’m afraid. I’m scared that some of my Christian friends and family aren’t going to accept me anymore after this (and I know I shouldn’t feel that way, if they are that way then what kind of friends are they, but these are very important people to me). And the fact is, I’m kinda lacking in other friends.

So, I guess I’m a coward. Maybe someday I’ll find the courage to tell the world what I believe…or at least to tell my world. Please, don’t follow my example on this one. I guess since I’m putting it on my blog it’s a start, but who’s reading it anyway? (If you are, good for you. Ask me questions if you have any, I’ll be happy to answer.)

Good night, and God bless!

Year 1 ACE

To anyone who's reading this, things are gonna be a little dfferent around here.

For one, I'll post sometimes.  Two, my outlook on things has drastically changed, due to the fact that I am not a Christian anymore.  Three, I may post on things I've posted on before, and I may contradict what I have said in the past.

You heard me right.  I don't see things through Christian glasses anymore.  It's much more liberating to think for myself.  I still believe in God, but I understand him differently.

As always, my posts will reflect my current beliefs.  I could make a post today on some issue, change my mind or find new relevant facts on it, and post on it again tomorrow.  Before when I used an issue I left it alone afterwards.

Welcome to Year 1 ACE (After Christian Era).  It'll be a fun ride.  And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Good night, and God bless!

Fantasyland

This is where I live.  Unfortunately, I spend way too much time at home.

I live in a world where I'm rich and I can have any woman I want.  Sometimes I can fly, sometimes I can speak different languages, sometimes I'm in goal for the Habs.  There's so many other things I can do here, from the mundane to the miraculous.  Then I open my eyes.

I open them to a life where I have a boring job, and no social life.  No girlfriend, no driver's license, no idea what I want to do with my life.  This is what happens when you spend too much time in fantasyland and not enough time on your real life.  Spend too much time away from reality, and there won't be anything left in it when you get back.

Life takes work.  Of course, that doesn't mean you can't have fun with it, far from it.  Also, it's not a good idea to remove fantasyland altogether, as without a mental escape sometimes, you are going to go insane, I guarantee it.  My point is that the real world is the higher priority and must be given the greater attention.  When you're satisfied with your reality, then fly off with the birdies to your heart's content...until your reality needs your attention again.

I think this entry is probably more for me than anyone else, but if it has helped another, so much the better. 

Good night, and God bless.

Have Your Bank Card Ready?

I'm guilty of it too.  Sometimes, I just ask God for stuff and leave it at that.  This is not the attitude I want to have towards him.

You see, I want God to be my friend, not a genie in a bottle.  But the way I talk to him sometimes, I'm kinda treating him more like an ATM than a trusted friend.  And that's not the way one ought to treat their friends.

So ask not what God can do for you, ask what you can do for God.  If you are doing stuff for him, he will do things for you as well, because he will know you are committed to him.  If you put time and effort into your relationship with him, you will reap some significant rewards, but the one that is most important is that God will be a close friend of yours.

Bye, and God bless.

Cry, Cry Again

At weddings and funerals my dad sometimes gets kinda weepy.  But you know, I don't know where we got this idea that that was a weakness.  My cousin got married yesterday and my dad was true to form, as they say.  It got me thinking, why are we so ashamed to hide some of our emotions? 

I definitely don't consider it a weakness on his part.  It might be a weakness on mine, since I'm not the kind of guy to cry at a wedding or even a funeral.  Good on him, I say.  No one should be ashamed to cry at a wedding.  It's a joyous occasion and a natural reaction for some people.  I saw other people who were crying as well.  Tears of joy are a great thing, they show you care.

It's one thing if you cry because you break a nail.  It's quite another if you cry because you're celebrating a joyous occasion.  Quite honestly, I wish I could express myself as easily at these things.

And if you're crying because you're sad, of course it's okay.  I cried when Melissa dumped me.  A perfectly legitimate and understandable response - I cared a great deal about her and had a lot emotionally invested.

I just don't see why tears are a weakness.  This macho attitude we all seem to want to have is not only stupid, it's phony as well.  Real strength lies in a person's character, and that includes not being afraid to cry when the situation calls for it.

In conclusion, don't be afraid to feel. 

Bye, and God bless.

Sensory Perception
Now Playing: Informer - Snow

Many people, myself included, complain that they can't figure out what God wants for them, what God is saying to them.  And many of those reach the conclusion that since they don't hear God's voice, that God isn't speaking to them, that God doesn't have a plan for them, even that God doesn't exist.

I don't know everything that God says to me, but I know he's communicating with me.  All the time.  Everything I have is thanks to Him and He just keeps providing for me.  He constantly teaches me new things, often multiple times until I get it.  He's probably screaming something now for the millionth time and I'm still not hearing it.  Or maybe I am and I'm tuning Him out - that happens more often than I care to admit.

God communicates with us in countless ways.  Some we perceive and some we don't.  But given that He is omniscient I think He knows what He's talking about when He speaks.  My plea is to not only keep your ears open, but the rest of your senses as well.  And not only receive the message, but apply it as well. 

Good night, and God bless.

Garbage In, Garbage Out
Now Playing: Bring Me Down - April Sixth
It's a basic law of everyday life. If you put bad thoughts into your head, you're likely do to bad actions. If you don't give any effort in life, then you're not going to get very much out of it. Every action is matched by a consequence, whether good or bad.

The basic idea here is that you reap what you sow. If you plant carrots, what do you expect to get? Onions? Now I realize that some circumstances are beyond our control, but it's the way we respond to our circumstances, whether we can control them or not, that has a direct bearing on what happens with our life.

Input = Output. So please, be careful what you input.

Bye, and God bless.

The Looking Glass
Now Playing: She Loves Me Not - Papa Roach
I was talking with Jessie the other day and she got me thinking. In our Christian life, many of us often have a tendency to listen to just anyone who will voice their opinion. As I told her, some of these people are going to be right, and some are going to be wrong, and it's really up to us to decide. But the thing is that sometimes we are willing to believe anything that sounds spiritual enough at face value, before investigating it.

My friend has been through quite a lot lately, having to deal with some people that she knows very well are going to drag her down. And God bless her, she knows it and she is taking steps to remove these destructive people from her life. I mean, a person can only fail you so many times before you have to let them know that you can't be around them anymore. I think what she's doing is really smart and it will bring her closer to God.

Here's the part where I usually make my plea. I won't disappoint: Examine everything you are told about God. That's generally a good rule about anything, but absolutely critical where it concerns God. Don't just blindly believe anything, instead, put it all under the microscope and discard what is useless and illogical. For instance, if someone told me that Mary was divine, I would have to reject that because I see no evidence, Scriptural or otherwise, to support this claim. But there are many people that believe it.

Look, I don't think I know everything. I am fully aware that there are a great many things I believe that couldn't be more wrong. I dispense a lot of advice in this blog and I know I can't be right all the time. So put me and my words under the microscope too.

Bye, and God bless.

Go Canes Go!
Just for this series. I refuse to cheer for Edmonton.

I never understood why people would cheer for a team just because they are from a Canadian city. Edmonton has as many foreign players as any other team. So the Oilers are the only Canadian team left in the playoffs. The Oilers are playing for Edmonton, not for Canada. That's why I don't feel the need to cheer for them just because it's a Canadian city. I've never liked the Oilers and likely never will. The fact that the Hurricanes play in an American city makes no difference to me.

I'm cheering for Carolina over Edmonton because I look beyond the team location and actually evaluate whether I like the teams. Carolina, while not one of my favorite teams, I sure like a whole lot better than Edmonton.

What's my point in all this? My point is that you have to look deeper. I often feel my faith gets a bad rap because of all the stereotypes that come to mind when you hear me mention I'm a Christian. And it's not just Christianity that gets a bum rap. Do you really think all Muslims are terrorists or that all atheists are amoral? (Actually, some of them put some of us to shame morally.) I would want the seeker to take an honest look at each faith that he is considering seriously, even if he decides that he can't believe in Christ just yet. At least he's being honest with himself. God has never tolerated phonies.

Also, with people, just because someone looks a certain way doesn't mean they are that way. Many a woman has been raped because of this misunderstanding. Many an unpopular kid has been torchered. We have to look beyond the outside appearance and into the soul of other people. Then we will see their real beauty, their real essence.

By the way, now that Roloson is out, 'Canes in 4. Get out the brooms.

Bye, and God bless.

Being An Ass
You know, some people think that God has no purpose for their lives. They think serving God, in any capacity, is best left to the uber-religious crowd, the pastors, elders, etc...

Well, I got news for you. God has a use for you. He put you here because you are unique and have special gifts that he wants you to use. And He may have a use for you at any time.

About 2000 years ago, there was a donkey tied up just outside the city of Jerusalem. I doubt that animal was thinking he was going to be bringing the Christ into Jerusalem. But Jesus needed the donkey for his triumphal entry.

We likewise should seek to be Christ-bearers. At any time, we should be ready to serve him in whatever role He needs us to fill. It brings new meaning to being an ass.

Bye, and God bless.

Rhyme And Reason
I used to think I knew it all
But I found out I had far to fall
I found out that all I knew
Was that I didn't have a clue.

Now I am all of twenty-three
Still everything I do not see
I guess that's why my life's not done
The days without some learning are none.

Maybe we should listen to the words spoke
By all of our dear older folk
I mean, they've lived more life than me
And most live more successfully.

Thie poem was not meant to be good
Long as my point is understood
All I needed was a post that rhymes
I won't do this too many times.

There's nothing more I have to say
Farewell, God bless you, and good day.